Considering I work from home (or WFH, if you speak industry jargon), I love me some day baseball. So it’s a happy day indeed as the Nats and Padres have a matinee this afternoon. Unfortunately, that also means I must suffer MASN’s broadcast duo of Bob Carpenter and Rob Dibble.

Let’s turn lemons into lemonade with a list of inanities and inaccuracies. I’ll keep updating it as long as I can, and please do share your own.
———————————————————————————-
“I love to see guys like J.D. and Mock go seven or eight innings in their past four or five starts.” — Dibble (Fact: J.D. Martin has never pitched more than six innings in a Major League start. Nor has Garrett Mock.)
———————————————————————————-
“What’d you think of my seamanship?” — Dibble
“You’re a salty dog.” — Carpenter
———————————————————————————-
“Are those hands between some pillows … hey, how ’bout those Dodgers.” — Dibble, butchering lines from Planes, Trains & Automobiles
———————————————————————————-
“Eckstein is gonna grind out an at-bat every time.” — Dibble (Fact: David Eckstein ranks 110th in pitches/plate appearance. He’s also awful.)
———————————————————————————-
“That guy can play second base for me anywhere … He’s a winner.” — Carpenter on Eckstein (This sparked a discussion on how good Eckstein is, how much harder he works than Adrian Gonzalez, etc. Classic stuff.)