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Redskins-49ers Winners & Losers

Handing out labels following Skins games, this time a 17-13 loss in San Francisco.

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Winners

Alfred Morris — Topped 100 yards rushing for the first time this season, which is nice.

Tress Way — Pinned two or three inside the 10 and averaged 47 per. Team MVP.

Jim Haslett — It brings me no joy to slap the “winner” tag on Haz, and it’s no great feat to hold the 49ers to 17, but his squad did it despite being down to Santana Moss at cornerback. (Really.)

Greg Ducre — I’ll be honest, I’d never heard of him before he came in and almost immediately intercepted Colin Kaepernick. (Note: He’s now tied for the team lead in interceptions. With one.)

Keenan Robinson — I don’t trust many Redskins, but I do trust Keenan Robinson.

Ryan Kerrigan — Racked up a sack, giving him 8.5 on the season. This may be the defense’s best (only?) vanity stat.

Brandon Meriweather and Trent Murphy — Each forced a fumble. Those were the good times.

CBS — I approve of Kevin Harlan and Rich Gannon. Much improved over what we usually get with Fox.

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Losers

Robert Griffin III — Aside from turnovers and toughness, he was terrible in every aspect. It’s hard to see a good outcome from here.

The offensive line — The combo of RGIII’s skittishness/indecisiveness/unawareness and this line’s inability to conduct itself at a professional level is lethal indeed.

Jay Gruden — It’s a very real possibility that Gruden isn’t the offensive coordinator that Kyle Shanahan is or the head coach that Mike Shanahan was. He did win his first challenge, though!

DeSean Jackson — Two catches for 39 yards isn’t “epic shit”; it’s just shit.

Dan Snyder — 50 years young today. Only ~34 more to go!

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Medium

Pierre Garcon — Who knew 88 could throw the ball 60-plus yards?

(Photos taken with love from the Waahington Post.)

D.C. sports fan and digital media guy that's been doing this since 2004. Once threw a football further than Chris Cooley.

16 Comments

16 Comments

  1. Broface

    November 23, 2014 at 11:16 PM

    Winner: the skins ball boy giving boldin the classic F U.

  2. Jim Ed

    November 23, 2014 at 11:39 PM

    Winners:

    Four Roses Small Batch Bourbon – You’re hard pressed to find a better drinking bourbon under $50 (on sale at Calvert-Woodley for $27.99, natch) to help smooth over the death knell of the Griffin Era. To quote future Wizard Kevin Durant, “you the real MVP”.

    RG3 – Unless there’s some sort of Lazarus-eqsue ressurection next week, his career here is effectively finished in the next few weeks. A fresh start somewhere else is the best thing he could ever ask for. I hope he rubs this franchise’s face in it when he hoists the Lombardi trophy for the Patriots in 2017.

    John Wall – Who woulda thunk back in 2010 that out of Harper, Strasburg, Griffin, and Ovechkin, John wall would be the star with the brightest trajectory and most legitimate chance of having a parade down Pennsylvania Ave? Sports are weird.

    Losers:

    Basically everyone else – This season has mentally broken one of my best friends – he can’t watch sports at all currently because his soul has been strangled to death by this franchise. No NBA,This is where we’re at, but I have such little faith in this franchise I’m in no way ready to say we’ve hit rock bottom because if there’s one thing the Snyder owned Skins excel at, its finding new and uncharted sectors of misery and embarrassment to subject their fanbase to. They’re the fucking Hubbell Telescope of sadness.

    • Jim Ed

      November 23, 2014 at 11:41 PM

      And I spelled Hubble wrong. See Winner #1 for explanation.

  3. illformula

    November 24, 2014 at 9:12 AM

    RG is fucking terrible. Absolutely terrible. In fact, he’s so fucking terrible that actual football people believe that Colt McCoy is a better option.

    I feel bad for Garcon. He’s legitimately the best WR we’ve had in decades and we can’t get him the ball. He won’t wait around for this shit storm at QB to pass by. Fuck…

  4. RL

    November 24, 2014 at 9:43 AM

    Thanks for the call out JimEd. This whole RG3 thing has unfolded like Brooks’ character in Shawshank. Before Rg3, we had only known the grey walls of our prison, which, while not great, was at least our reality. Then 2012, we were released from prison, and blue skies were on the horizon. Skip forward a few scenes and were hanging from an exposed beam in a halfway house.

  5. SiPhi

    November 24, 2014 at 10:14 AM

    Has Robert Griffin III played horrendously the last two games? Yes. Has he played mostly poorly this entire year? Yes. Would the Skins have a winning record if Colt McCoy or Kirk Cousins started every game this year? No. Our entire team is awful.

  6. DocJ

    November 24, 2014 at 10:25 AM

    Our OLine is awful. Cousins and McCoy are sitting back saying, nah man, you go out there, I am good… What is better, Cousins throwing for 300 yards and 3 picks or RG3 throwing for 100 yards and no picks. Either way we lose. And how about Harbaugh, “Good teams build their players up, not tear them down”. Who has the brighter future, the Washington Redskins or the Oakland Raiders?

    Can we get some “Our Punter is Better than Your Punter” shirts?

    • SiPhi

      November 24, 2014 at 11:34 AM

      I like where your head is at with the Punter shirts

  7. Ryan

    November 24, 2014 at 11:01 AM

    Why they didn’t help Moses with a RB or TE is inexplicable.

  8. Glenn

    November 24, 2014 at 11:15 AM

    So why did CBS carry this game instead of Fox? The Skins and Niners are still in the NFC, right? Not that it matters much which network carries these games.

    • deepvalue

      November 24, 2014 at 5:50 PM

      They lost a bet.

  9. Derpley

    November 24, 2014 at 6:48 PM

    I think when we draw up the top 10 memories of the 2014 Skins season, seeing Garcon uncork a 60+ yard incomplete pass like he was flinging a nerf ball in his backyard will be up there. Hell, I might be telling my grandkids about that throw someday, considering the #eternalsadness that plagues this team.

    Other thoughts:

    Bob is done. Even Chuck Knoblauch thinks he’s done. The man needs a change of scenery, an exorcist, a bionic knee and summer camp with George Whitfield in the worst way. I, for one, can’t wait to see him get mentored for two years by Elway and P. Manning and then rip off three straight super bowls in Denver.

    Moss is still on the team? (lol)

    When I first heard the TV crew call out Ducre’s name, I thought his name was “Dufresne.” Which naturally led to me making non-stop Shawshank jokes. Because, y’know, shit-smelling foulness. Dufresne (and Snyder) knows all about that.

    • SiPhi

      November 25, 2014 at 12:51 PM

      If that happens, the Broncos will become my AFC team. That is something I never thought I would have, but it would be great to watch them instead of this shitshow.

  10. Jones

    November 25, 2014 at 5:40 PM

    Losers: You all, for not even getting the score right

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