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Pithily Ranking All 8 MLB Playoff Teams

cup-drinker.jpgThis list is excerpted as part of a group effort over at Yahoo!’s Big League Stew, and the others in the group actually know shit about baseball, so you should just go there now.

1. Red Sox: Kevin Youkilis’ batting stance bothers me so much, as does every fiber of Jonathan Papelbon’s being. Still, they score more runs than anyone else in the AL quartet, and their pitching is near the top.

2. Cubs: Not sure the city of St. Louis could survive a Jim Edmonds-powered Cubs championship. And by “city of St. Louis,” I mean Will Leitch.

3. Phillies: Jamie Moyer’s continued success is beyond my realm of comprehension, but I refuse to question it. After him and Cole though, that rotation is more suspect than Jayson Werth’s landing strip.

4. Rays: One must be leery of any playoff club with a team MVP who sports a sub-.700 OPS. Conversely, one must always root for teams that swill beer from banana cups.

5. Angels: Most boring team in the field? Most boring team in the field.

6. Dodgers: Is there enough magic in the moonlight for Torre and Manny to make it a Boston-L.A. World Series? No.

7. Brewers: As much as I love CC, Prince, Braun and the idea of the Brew Crew, they have all the makings of a one-and-done.

8. White Sox: Advancement to the ALCS would be a shot to two things: a) the merits of the current playoff system and b) my interest in the ALCS.

D.C. sports fan and digital media guy that's been doing this since 2004. Once threw a football further than Chris Cooley.



  1. StetSportsBlog

    October 1, 2008 at 3:03 PM

    1. I’ll see your pith, and raise you Dan Steinberg.

    2. No humorous, 1500-word post on the epic failure that is the Washington Nationals?

  2. Chris Mottram

    October 1, 2008 at 3:38 PM

    Here’s the thing about the Nats epic failure of a season: It mercifully ended while I was out of town, and I just can’t bring myself to waste more space on them now, especially with the Skins being all we really care about at this point.

  3. Unsilent Majority

    October 1, 2008 at 4:22 PM

    “Kevin Youkillis’ batting stance bothers me so much”

    Not to mention the whole “Jew” thing.

  4. Terps77

    October 1, 2008 at 10:35 PM

    Did this dude call “No homo”?

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