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Philly Fans DARE YOU to Think They Can’t Possibly Get More Disgusting

The world's biggest piece of shitSomething I’ve learned as I’ve aged: Nobody likes the drunk asshole at the ballgame. I can admit that there have been times in the past when I may have been that asshole. (I realize this unbelievable revelation has shocked you to the core, so feel free to take a minute.) Screaming profanities towards the field and opposing fans like it’s my GOD GIVEN RIGHT to act like this at a sporting event. It’s not.

You know what else isn’t cool to do at sporting events? Projectile vomiting all over a father and his two daughters … on purpose (‘Cause if it were an accident, we’d all understand, right?):

That fan — identified by police as Matthew Clemens — was sitting with another, unrelated group of fans who were also disciplined for acting out when he allegedly did what Vangelo describes as the “most disgusting thing” he’s ever seen.

Clemens, 21, positioned himself behind the 11-year-old’s chair, stuck his fingers down his throat and vomited on the girl and her father, police said.

“He leaned forward, he projectile vomited all over me and my daughter,” Vangelo said with a look of hurt splashed across his face.

Clemens picked the wrong person to puke on: Vangelo is a police officer, who was off-duty, attempted to enjoy a Phillies-Nats game with his daughters. As you can see in the photo, Vangelo landed at least one solid punch to Clemens’ head, which is¬†approximatively¬†1,000 punches too few.

Former Managing Editor at UPROXX; former Senior Editor at @SBNation; former ska-zine editor, fan of bad sports teams and good beer.

7 Comments

7 Comments

  1. DocJ

    April 16, 2010 at 10:42 AM

    Hurt wasnt the only thing splashing across his face.

  2. Philly Dwella

    April 16, 2010 at 12:16 PM

    Who the hell are you, Chris Mottram, to call us disgusting. I am so sick of us getting a bad rep just because one guy acts like an a$$. The guy is not even from Philly, he’s from Cherry Hill, NJ. This is the prime example of “lazy journalism.” YPeople like you pick on us because we are an easy target. How about you do a little research to see what has happened in other places in regards to fans before opening your big mouth.

  3. nickjarvis

    April 16, 2010 at 12:36 PM

    Chris, it’s nice to see a post from you, always hilarious. Anywho, the asteemed Mr. Vangelo at least should have landed a second right uppercut to good ole’ Mr. Kanesh, if not for anything else but to remind that fat *uck how he hasn’t seen his dick since he was 9. If you ever feel like you are not around enough Douche Sponsors just go to Philly, they accommodate.

  4. nickjarvis

    April 16, 2010 at 12:46 PM

    @philly dwella. This is a DMV humor blog chatting about DMV shit, also, It’s disturbing how sensitive you are and how you are creeping on a DMV site. Sorry Chris did not check in with his editor before posting something on his DMV blog to make DMV fans laugh. Oh wait I am actually so retarded that I think all Philly fans vomit on Fathers with their daughters. Oops. notice the pattern, DMV.

  5. horseydeucey

    April 16, 2010 at 1:11 PM

    Mr. Dwella, as fat as you seem in the above picture, and guessing by the mammoth shiner you’re sporting, you kind of appear to have been an easy target in this instance. And you look a little like the son of Andy Milonakis and ‘Throw Momma From the Train”(OWEN!!!)– you should work on that.

  6. Some Redskins Fan

    April 16, 2010 at 2:34 PM

    Fuck Philly, Philly Dwella can suck it.

  7. kip

    April 16, 2010 at 4:10 PM

    Philly Dwella’s dad never loved him….what a tool and go back to your shit hole town philadelphia

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