Most Wiz fans fall into one of three categories, all of them sad.
The first is children of the ’80s, myself included, reared on the duo of Jeff and Moses Malone. Those were not good teams, and they never won a playoff series. They’re probably most-remembered for having 7’7″ Manute Bol and 5’3″ Muggsy Bogues.
The second bucket is ’90s kids, who got to enjoy C-Webb and Juwan, for three years at least. They almost took a first-round game off of the Jordan Bulls. It was the only time they made the playoffs all decade.
Those raised on ’00s Wizards basketball were slightly more fortunate. They got Gilbert, who was great, especially during the Agent Zero thing. Then they spiraled into five seasons of 27-55 basketball.
But things are looking up! The Wiz lucked into Wall and Beal, and they’ve been two wins shy of the conference finals each of the past two years. To get over the hump, though, and be a true contender, they need another major piece.
Previously: Sneeki’s Washington “Football Team” T-Shirt