Redskins-Giants Predictions

NFL: Washington Redskins at New York Giants

Congrats to Mikeyvanilli for correctly picking that Washington would fall to Philly in a barnburner. Now he gets to make a guest post!

Moving on, here are our crackerjack staff’s completely scientific predictions for Sunday. Make yours down in the comments. Whichever reader is closest to the actual outcome gets to be a published author on this here weblog.

Chris Mottram: Redskins, 31-17

There are so many reasons why this game is difficult to predict — Cousins is still a bit of a mystery, the defense is wildly inconsistent, the secondary is without D-Hall, we don’t know how many points the secondary will cost Washington, and it’s on a Thursday. But it’s at home, and NY, by any statistical measurement, seems to be the worse 1-2 team.

JP Finlay: Redskins, 20-17

Not to be a downer, but once the Eagles made halftime adjustments, Cousins didnt look nearly as good. Take out the bomb to DeSean and the Helu screen, and that offense didn’t move the ball in the 2nd half. Seemed like Cousins didnt like pressure, and Coughlin will see that on film. So low scoring, but I think the Skins still win.

Matt Terl: Giants, 28-24

Honestly, I have no clue. I don’t even know what narrative would be the most Redskins at this point, so I’ll just assume the depleted defense and the perennially awful special teams will give up more points than the offense will score.

Jamie Mottram: Redskins, 27-20

I think the most Redskins thing would be for them to win this game and for Cousins to look good, therefore getting all of our hopes up before stumbling to a 5-11 season while being equal parts Bad Rex and Good Rex.

Andy Peden: Redskins, 27-20

Giants will not be able to run the ball like they did against Houston. Redskins will run the ball better than last week.

Jack Kogod: Redskins, 24-17

I don’t know how or why.

Todd Davis: Redskins, 38-17

The Redskins are one of the most difficult teams to support for so many reasons, but by fully embracing their heel turn in glorious fashion last week, I’m completely and unreservedly back on board (at least this week). The fightin’, the cheering injuries, the Gruden throwing in a fat lipper on national TV, the smack talk and the go-for-broke beauty of KC1 was as exciting as Savage turning after Hogan “groped” Miss Elizabeth or Tito Santana misplacing a Flying Burrito into Rick Martel.

We all know how these story lines set up and the Skins are perfectly positioned for a heel’s rampage before the inevitable fall. But for at least this week, the Giants will keep kayfabe and everyone’s new favorite villain (complete with offensive naming and a Danny the Brain manager to give heat to the Skins by giving out blankets and backhoes through the Original Americans Foundation) will absolutely roll.

Composite prediction: Redskins, 27-19

How Realistic Is KD-to-D.C.?

Here with a look at one of our favorite fantasies is Mr. Irrelevant contributing writer Bryan Frantz.

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Those of you watching the Redskins’ glorious 41-10 beatdown of the Jacksonville Jaguars last week may have seen Wizards point guard John Wall taking in the game at the same time as a very special guest.

Naturally, seeing reigning NBA MVP Kevin Durant at a Redskins game with the face of D.C. basketball, both decked out in Redskins gear, had some fans rather giddy. Perhaps excited enough to forget about the face of D.C. football getting hurt again? Continue reading

Redskins-Eagles Winners & Losers

Handing out labels following Skins games. This time a 37-34 loss at Philly.

Winners

Kirk Cousins — Rex Grossman-esque crunch-time INT aside, he was terrific, and it makes me rethink last week’s “How Good Is Kirk Cousins?” poll. My vote was for New York Mark Sanchez, you see, and most of you voted for Poor Man’s Andy Dalton or Young Matt Hasselbeck. But now I’m thinking, Normal-Sized Nick Foles.

Pierre Garcon — Had a huge day, including two fantastic catches along the sideline (see above). With apologies to Santana Moss, he’s my favorite receiver since Art Monk.

DeSean Jackson — Caught an 81-yard TD pass and taunted his skinny little ass off. Of course he did. I’m not ready to love him yet.

Niles Paul — He’s a pass-catcher all of the sudden! (Six for 68.)

Bashaud Breeland — That strip on Darren Sproles was crucial.

Darrel Young — Three TDs in three games for the fullback vulture.

Tress Way — Three punts at 56.7 yards per. None blocked!

Losers

Ben Kotwica — It’s hard enough to root for the Redskins when they’re not doing things like giving up a kickoff return for a TD and doinking a 33-yard field goal. AND THEY DO THIS SHIT LIKE EVERY WEEK.

Kai Forbath — Aforementioned 33-yard doink.

Jim Haslett — We won’t have to hear any more about the Skins having “the No. 1 defense in the NFL.” Also, the Eagles were missing like four-fifths of their offensive line.

Perry Riley — Looked lost on both of Jordan Matthews’ TD catches.

Trent Murphy — Got his name called! For roughing the passer.

E.J. Biggers — Sure did earn that deep PI call.

Ryan Grant — Dropped what would’ve been a first down on third-and-long. It was his only target.

Bruce Allen — I don’t know why he’s involved in challenges, but that was one of the more asinine challenges.

Medium

Jay Gruden — The good news is this doesn’t appear to be a bad team, and they’ve put 85 points on the board in the past two weeks. The bad news is they’re 1-2, he lost his first division game and that was as idiotic a challenge as you’re going to see. Nice lipper, though.

Chris Baker — I didn’t have a problem with the block he put on Foles, but I don’t know, maybe that’s just because I’m a Skins fan.

Alfred Morris — Didn’t have much room to rumble and coughed one up, but I can’t label FroMo a loser.

DeAngelo Hall — Forced a fumble and didn’t get called for any foolishness. May have torn his Achilles’.

Joe Buck and Troy Aikman — I’m not fond of the A-Team, but they’re so much better than the alternative.

Redskins-Eagles Predictions

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Congrats to SiPhi and Donk Donkerson for correctly picking that the Redskins would do the Jaguars like that. Can’t say I saw it coming. Now they each get to make a guest post!

Moving on, here are our crackerjack staff’s completely scientific predictions for Sunday. Make yours down in the comments. Whichever reader is closest to the actual outcome gets to be a published author on this here weblog.

Chris Mottram: Redskins, 27-24

I don’t know why I’m doing this, other than Nick Foles has looked not good, I’m overly excited about the Skins front seven right now, and Jay Gruden has the quarterback he always wanted to run his offense.

(Also, if anyone sees someone wearing a “KC1″ shirt, you’re legally obligated to punch them in the face.)

Andy Peden: Eagles, 27-17

Cousins now has a career 57.6 completion percentage with 10 TD and 10 INT. I think that probably equates to a shitty day against a real team.

Matt Terl: Eagles, 31-17

Cousins throws at least one severely damaging interception, but his fans are undeterred and launch a petition to have the waiting period waived for his enshrinement in Canton.

JP Finlay: Eagles, 30-21

Eagles are pretty good, and still haven’t fully clicked. The aqua-blue haze from the Jaguars game is hard to see out of, but the Skins front wont get to Foles like they did Henne. Cousins throws a big pick (like Terl said), Skins lose but look decent.

Jack Kogod: Eagles, 27-20

I’ll take Philly and the under.

Jamie Mottram: Redskins, 27-24

No one runs the Dalton Coast offense better than living legend Kirk Cousins. (Or, you know, Andy Dalton.)

Todd Davis: Eagles, 28-13

Nothing to see here and the Cousins/Dalton nonsense crashes immediately. And I second punching KC1 wearers.

Composite prediction: Eagles, 27-20

The Top 5 Nats and O’s Celebration Vines Taken By Chris Mottram

I was pretty excited to watch both the Nats and O’s possibly clinch their respective division championships last night. What ended up happening, though, is I fell asleep on the couch after putting the kids to bed, and woke up well past the Nats party and just as the O’s party was getting started.

Thankfully, my brother Chris only has one kid, not three, so he was able to stay up and take pictures of his TV. Fun!

1. Bryce came prepared

2. This is how it’s done

3. Another reason to hate Soriano

4. Kevin Frandsen’s most important contribution this year

5. Meanwhile, in Baltimore …

It is only September 17th. Rest up for October.

The One Constant Has Been FroMo

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Just sharing a little statistical oddity that I noticed. From the division-winning 2012 season to the shit-stained ’13 and now into ’14, the one constant, the one Redskin who has played at a high and steady level through the ups and downs, is Alfred Morris:

2012: 16 G, 1,613 YD, 4.8 AVG, 13 TD, 4 FUM
2013: 16 G, 1,275 YS, 4.6 AVG, 7 TD, 5 FUM
2014 (projected), 16 G, 1,408 YDS, 4.9 AVG, 16 TD, 0 FUM

That’s pretty awesome, and good for an average of 90 rushing yards per game through 34 career games. If that doesn’t sound like a lot, know that it’s sixth-best all time, right between Eric Dickerson and Walter Payton. (Two spots ahead of Clinton Portis!)

Not bad for a 173rd overall pick who was a throw-in for Donovan McNabb. Go, FroMo, go.

How Good Is Kirk Cousins?

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I think most of us are a little high on Kirk Cousins coming off of his pinch-hit performance against Jacksonville. Maybe pump the brakes on that, though (via Bill Barnwell):

Of the 47 quarterbacks who threw 200 passes or more in the regular season and playoffs between 2012 and 2013, Cousins was 43rd in completion percentage and yards per attempt, 44th in passer rating, and 46th in interception rate. His rate numbers are an almost exact duplicate for Mark Sanchez’s final season as the starter in New York, when he completed 54.3 percent of his passes and averaged 6.4 yards per attempt. Cousins turns the ball over more frequently than Sanchez did that final year, and he didn’t even get attacked by any offensive linemen.

Mark Sanchez! That’s even worse than my go-to comp for Cousins, which is “poor man’s Andy Dalton.” It’s an even further cry from, say, young Matt Hasselbeck, which seems like the best-case scenario. I’m curious to get a gauge for what Redskins fans think, though …


Redskins-Jaguars Winners & Losers

Handing out labels following every Washington game. This time, a 41-10 win over Jacksonville.

WINNERS

Kirk Cousins. Made sports talk radio callers the happiest people in the D.C. area this morning. Completed 66 percent of his passes for 250 yards and a pair of TDs with no turnovers. This happened against the Jaguars. This Sunday against Philly will be an actual test.

Ryan Kerrigan. Four sacks, generally unstoppable all day.

The Running Game. Morris/Redd/Helu combined for 128 yards and three touchdowns with Griffin and Andre Roberts throwing in another 41 yards. As a team, they averaged 4.5 yards per carry with 191 total on the ground.

Jason Hatcher. Seemed to be in the backfield all game, had 1.5 sacks of his own.

Chris Baker. Played great at his natural nose tackle position, danced even better after the game.

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Mr. Irrelevant is a D.C. sports blog covering the Redskins, Nationals, Orioles, Wizards, Capitals, Terrapins and more.