Category Archives: Winners & Losers

Redskins-Eagles Winners & Losers

Handing out labels following Skins games, this time a soggy, glorious 23-20 win over Philly.

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Kirk Cousins — Like most middling, inconsistent quarterbacks, there is Good Kirk and there is bad Kirk. This was Very Good Kirk, from the mistake-free football throughout to the 90-yard game-winning drive at the end. It was a tantalizing glimpse of what we hope will be the future, but we’d like to see him do it again next week. (Bonus points for the burgundy suit.)

Pierre Garcon — Continues an odd season of very short receptions (only nine yards/catch), but that touchdown at the end was so impressive. A great moment for him, and a ray of light for the franchise.

Jamison Crowder — Led the team in targets with 12 (no one else had more than eight). Seems to have supplanted Andre Roberts as the slot guy, and rightfully so.

Alfred Morris — Only 62 yards on 17 carries, but he reasserted himself a bit as the alpha back, and he was huge on that final drive.

Chris Thompson — Ninety total yards? He had 133 in all of 2013-14 plus the start of this year. Looks like he’s the third-down back.

The Hogs — One sack on 46 dropbacks, and four yards/carry against a tough run defense. That’s how you possess the ball for 41-plus minutes, and that’s generally how you win games.

Chris Baker — Two sacks for the big boy, and a nice celebration dance, which he said was the “Milly Rock.” Here’s how you too can do the Milly Rock.

Trent Murphy — A big sack and a fun lateral-interception of sorts on the final drive.

Bashaud Breeland — He really is our best corner, isn’t he?

Terrance Knighton“It’s a rivalry. I don’t want to shake hands.”

Dustin Hopkins — One hundred-percent touchback rate.

Jay Gruden — As usual, he needed this. And I thought he called a pretty good game, too.


Jordan Reed — The fumble was tough. The concussion is even tougher. Hopefully he’s able to (safely) return quickly, unlike 2013, when he missed the last six weeks of the season.

Chris CulliverShowed toughness playing through a knee injury. Still got burnt for two touchdowns.

Matt Jones — Had nowhere to run (11 yards on seven carries).

Ryan Grant — Didn’t do much, but was targeted a season-high seven times.

Tress Way — When punting from the other team’s 35-yard-line, it’s best to not put it five yards deep in their end zone.


We the fans — Let’s stay this way, despite beating a division rival to move into a three-way tie for first before a Week 5 matchup with the 4-0 Falcons.

Ryan Kerrigan — Finally sacked Sam Bradford on the final drive after whiffing on him at least twice earlier in the game. It was his first full sack of the season. Here’s to many more.

Redskins-Giants Winners & Losers

Handing out labels following Skins games. This time a 32-21 loss in New York on a Thursday night that was miserable from start to finish.

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Keenan Robinson — Seemed to play well, side-to-side (13 tackles).

Rashad Ross — The Redskins scored their first special teams TD in five years! Of course, the game was already well out of hand when it happened, but it’s good just knowing that such a thing is in the realm of possibility.

Dustin Hopkins — Touchbacks are so nice.


Kirk Cousins — Threw a bad pick from his own 10 and continued to make poor throws throughout the first half. Threw another INT in the second half for good measure, this time on a tipped ball that he tried to force in for a short gain on 1st-and-10.

Cousins-Elway comparisonsYeah, no.

Terrance Plummer — Let RB Rashad Jennings get through for a blocked punt, and was then called for holding on a fair catch. All while wearing London Fletcher’s number. May never see the field again.

Jay Gruden — A win would’ve been huge for him, but it was off the rails from the start.

The front seven — No pressure, no sacks.

Matt Jones — The only thing of consequence that he did was fumble it over the goal line for a touchback.

Alfred Morris — Six carries, and he was second fiddle.

DeAngelo Hall — Suffered a non-contact injury.

Trenton Robinson — I barely know who he is, but he got trucked by Andre Williams. Shades of Brandon Jacobs-over-LaRon Landry.


Jordan Reed — Was still a steady threat in the passing game, but also negated a big play with a pick penalty on the opening drive.

Bashaud Breeland — Had some trouble with ODB, but who doesn’t?

Shawn Lauvao — Showed how valuable he is to the O-line by getting hurt in the early going.

Chris Thompson — Racked up some good garbage-time stats.

Sweet play-action fake image taken with love from @BrendanPorath.

Redskins-Rams Winners & Losers

Handing out labels following Skins games. This time a 24-10 win over St. Louis that I watched on DVR in 40 minutes while handling a 1-year-old.

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Kirk Cousins — 85% completions and no picks? Didn’t know Cuz had it in him.

The defense, especially the D-line — I would like to see them keep doing that thing where they allow only 10 points per game.

Matt Jones — Oh, you sexy, 146 yards on 22 touches beast. (That fumble, though.)

The O-line — 182 rushing yards. Kept Cousins clean, too.

Jordan Reed — There was a little debate in our comments last week about him being a top-five tight end. Six catches on six targets for 82 yards today, on pace for 104 catches and 1,160 yards for the season (top-three among TEs in both categories), so … maybe?

Dustin Hopkins — Nailed a 46-yarder and all but one touchback.

Jay Gruden — Oh my God did he need that. We all did.

Transitive properties — St. Louis beat Seattle last week, and Miami lost to Jacksonville today, so … Jaguars > Dolphins > Redskins > Rams > Seahawks.


The NFC East — The Eagles are 0-2. The Giants are 0-2. The Cowboys are 2-0, but Romo broke his collarbone. Meaning, the Redskins are just six wins shy of being 7-9 division champs!


Alfred Morris — It takes a big man to split carries with a rookie.

Ryan Grant — Hey, six targets for the second-year wideout.

Pierre Garcon — Six catches for 23 yards is just weird.

Redskins-Dolphins Winners & Losers

Handing out labels after Redskins games, this time a 17-10 loss to Miami.



Alfred Morris — Always good to see a well-fed FroMo (121 yards on 25 carries). Matt Jones got some too (28 on six), which means they ran it a lot, and effectively. Scored just 10 points, though, zero in the second half.

Brandon ScherffNeutralizing Ndamukong Suh is damn good.

Preston Smith — A sack and a sloppy forced fumble in his debut.

Dolphins fans They exist!


Jay Gruden — The attempted FG on 4th-and-1 in the first quarter comes to mind specifically, but in-game decisions in general don’t seem to be Gruden’s forte.

Special teams — Of course they gave up a punt return TD. Of course! Not that you need it read back to you, but here are the Redskins special teams rankings from 2014 to 2010, according to Football Outsiders: 29th, 32nd, 28th, 21st and 25th.

DeSean JacksonPulled a hammy on their second drive. Aside from Trent Williams, Scherff and maybe Kirk Cousins, that’s the last guy the offense can lose. So, maybe the fourth guy. Still, it’s a loss.

Andre Roberts — Dropped a WR screen, then quit on the play, despite it being a live ball.

Ndamukong SuhC’mon, man. Football is violent enough.

Chris Culliver and Keenan Robinson — Each dropped an INT, though Culliver’s was way worse, given that a) he’s a cornerback, b) it was right in his bread basket and c) he would’ve taken it to the house.



Kirk Cousins — About what you’d expect, although the yards/attempt (6.3) were down from his career average (7.4).

Pierre Garcon and Jordan Reed — Disappointments from 2014 were both decent (13 catches on 19 targets for 137 yards and a score).

New return men — Chris Thompson’s one KR went for 36 yards, and Jamison Crowder’s two PR’s went for 23. It’s something!

Redskins-Cowboys Winners & Losers

Handing out labels following Skins games, this time a 44-17 season-ending loss to Dallas.


DeSean Jackson — He made yet another big play, this time a 69-yard touchdown, to cap off a season full of them. They call him King Turd up here on Shit Mountain, but if you want it you can have the crown.


Jay Gruden — Lost by 27 to a rival with nothing to gain, finishing 4-12 with no hope, though he does still have a job.

Robert Griffin III — Two picks in the red zone, one fumble for six the other way and boatloads of doubt heading into 2015.

Jim Haslett — One more steaming pile from the Haz. PSGO.

Special teams coach whose name I never remember — Fell for the onside kick.

David Amerson — Burnt by Dez Bryant, burnt by Terrance Williams.

E.J. Biggers — That facemask tackle was textbook horseshit.

Pierre Garcon blindsides Cowboys defender


Pierre Garcon — The late block that set off a melee after RGIII’s TD was fine by me.

Roy Helu — The little move he pulled on the fake reverse was nice.

Draft position — We have the fifth overall pick to look forward to.

(GIF taken with love from The Big Lead.)

Redskins-Eagles Winners & Losers

Handing out labels following Skins games. Today, a 27-24 win over Philly.


DeSean Jackson — Four catches for 126 yards, including two for 50-plus. Even put a little something extra on it for Philly, which he’s now torn up twice since they cut him this year. Now has over 1,000 yards on the season and is averaging an NFL-best 20 yards per catch. Remarkable.

Jay Gruden — There are very few rules here, but one we do have is if you snap a six-game losing streak and put Philly’s playoff hopes on the ropes, then you’re a winner.

Robert Griffin III — Seventy percent completions, 10 yards per attempt and his one turnover was a 40-yard-net INT on third-and-long. Good enough.

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Redskins-Giants Winners & Losers

Handing out labels following Skins games. Today, a 24-13 loss at New York.


Robert Griffin III — While it wasn’t finest-hour stuff, he played well enough to make people (i.e., me) wonder why he was benched for Colt McCoy these past three weeks.


Jay Gruden — If he keeps his job, I will wish him well, but it’s not looking good for this dude.

Jim Haslett — How does Odell Beckham Jr. torch half the league, score two touchdowns against your own team and *then* go uncovered downfield for another TD? I don’t know, but it got called back, so ODB went and scored yet another TD.

That new special teams coach whose name I can never remember — Of course they gave up an onside kick coming out of the half.

The offensive line — Another seven sacks for this bunch. Some of those could probably be pinned to RGIII’s QB stylings, but still.

DeSean Jackson and Pierre Garcon — Fifteen targets for 51 yards. That’s not good.


Bashaud Breeland — I’m not sure a corner who was flagged four (or was it five?) times has ever played so well.

Ryan Kerrigan — Picked up another sack, apparently. That’s 12.5.

Will Compton — I’d never heard of this man before. He’s our starting middle linebacker.

DallasThey could win 11 games and still miss the playoffs.

Redskins-49ers Winners & Losers

Handing out labels following Skins games, this time a 17-13 loss in San Francisco.

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Alfred Morris — Topped 100 yards rushing for the first time this season, which is nice.

Tress Way — Pinned two or three inside the 10 and averaged 47 per. Team MVP.

Jim Haslett — It brings me no joy to slap the “winner” tag on Haz, and it’s no great feat to hold the 49ers to 17, but his squad did it despite being down to Santana Moss at cornerback. (Really.)

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