Category Archives: Uncategorized

Redskins-Ravens Winners & Losers

Handing out labels after Skins games, this time a oh god I don’t know what am I doing with my life 23-17 loss to the Ravens.

WINNERS

Keenan Robinson – Was all over the field, living up to the generally favorable reports he’s been getting all preseason. Notable plays included a 4th & 1 stop on the Ravens first drive and shutting down an end-around on the next drive. Looks like a major upgrade over the last year of London Fletcher.

Jason Hatcher – Finally got on the field post-surgery, and immediately helped lead to Joe Flacco looking pressured and harassed. So for at least one preseason game, he looks like exactly the kind of impact free agent signing the team was hoping for.

Trent Murphy – Bull-rushed his way into a sack and basically made a nuisance of himself all night.  Promising preseason continues for the rookie.

Andre Roberts – Had just one punt return for 23 yards, but it’s been a long drought between decent punt returners, so it seemed disproportionately incredible.

Kirk Cousins – I guess. I dunno. He went 14 for 20 for 122 yards and 2 touchdowns, but the Ravens’ top 3 corners were already out to start the game, so lord only knows who Cousins was throwing against. But … sure. He moved the ball. RG3 didn’t (SPOILER: see “Losers,” below). I dunno. I am so glad I don’t have to field emails and comments about the team this week.

People With Hot Takes About RG3 – Possibly the biggest winners of the whole night.

LOSERS

First-team offense – These guys were terrible, almost without exception. They opened with a strong Alfred Morris run, then threw an interception negated by penalty, had a bunch of no-gains, and settled for a field goal. They still haven’t scored a touchdown this preseason. There were good plays negated by penalties. Miscues. Oddities. False starts. Another near-interception (which also would’ve been negated by penalty), and then an actual interception. Oh, and Griffin was sacked 3 times. I am basically clinging to Bill Barnwell’s “preseason is meaningless” article like it is a floating door and I am a spunky, ahead-of-my-time rich girl who doesn’t want to marry Billy Zane.

Tress Way – Is a punter. Punted poorly.

The TV broadcast – Was apparently engaged in a duel to the death with the starting offense to see who could be worse at their jobs. Probably lost that competition, but not by much. In the first half, the broadcast spent an inordinate amount of time talking about how much Griffin has improved — stepping into his throws! working with Terry Shea! — while he put up terrible numbers. Joe Theismann repeatedly claimed to be unable to distinguish between Steve Smith and Santana Moss, and then compared Nick Williams to Wes Welker, Danny Amendola, and Julian Edelman, inexplicably failing to mention dozens of other famous white people. And Ken Harvey remains the worst sideline reporter in recorded human history, which is saying something if you remember Eric Dickerson’s work in that role.

Robert Griffin III – No way to spin it. He looked awful. Indecisive, inaccurate, overwhelmed, and maybe overcoached. But worse than losing a preseason game, he has now doomed us all to a week of lunatic quarterback controversy.

MEDIUM

Brandon Meriweather – Started off seeming active, and possibly improved. Made a nice stop in the backfield. Then he turned back into Brandon Meriweather, got called for a helmet-to-helmet hit, then fell down in coverage to give up a long gain. But he’s medium because, honestly, this is who he is, and he did a perfectly average job of being Brandon Meriweather.

#RedskinsFacts – Put together a well-produced, genuinely compelling commercial supporting their near-lunatic insistence on keeping the team name. On the other hand, its primary argument also seemed to boil down to “The Redskins name isn’t nearly as big a problem as poverty, alcoholism, or sub-par health care,” which … I mean, sure, that’s one approach you could take, but it’s not setting yourself a particularly high standard to match.

Tyler Clippard Earned It

121011110729-baseball-tyler-clippard-horizontal-gallery

The news that the Nats will have an all-star after all, and that that all-star will be Tyler Clippard, is a little puzzling. Basically because Rafael Soriano is the closer, and he has a 0.97 ERA to boot.

Clippard’s ERA (2.03) isn’t quite there, but his other numbers are. He leads the pen in innings (40) and strikeouts (53), and he handles high-leverage eighth-inning situations. Plus, he’s been doing it for years.

This may be his best year, though. His FIP’s never been lower (2.49), and his Ks per nine innings have never been higher (11.9).

It’s Clippard’s second all-star selection. You could say he’s come a long way since Jim Bowden got him for nothing.

Jayson Werth ‘Could Do Algorithms’

Via Kilgore:

“Just because you can do something else doesn’t mean you can hit. If you can hit, you can do anything. Because it’s the hardest thing to do. There’s nothing harder. I can bake a cake. I could figure out a way to do algorithms. But a guy that knows how to do algorithms could never hit. It’s literally the hardest thing to do. If you can do the hardest thing, you can do anything else.”

Whoa.

GIF via The Big Lead

(GIF taken with love from FTW.)

DMV: Links Of Pain

Shanahan is considering benching RGIII for the duration. [Insider]

Shanahan’s press conference sounded like a GREAT time. [Bog]

23 ways Shanahan could make Snyder fire him. Brilliant. [Bog]

The @redskins tweets during Skins-Chiefs were perfection. [Bog]

This KC-area Sonic sign during Skins-Chiefs is great too. [FTW]

Mike Wise thinks Dan Snyder should sell the team. Okay. [Wise]

Rizzo says Espinosa will be a utility infielder now. [Nats Journal]

Rizzo explains why he spent $10m on fourth OF Nate McLouth. [NJ]

The Wiz lose an ugly one 75-74 to the Nugs. [Bullets Forever]

Good news about Beal, and bad news about Harrington. [BF, BF]

Jordan Crawford named Eastern Conference POTW. [Wiz Insider]

Maryland is playing Marshall in the Military Bowl. [Terps Insider]

D.C. is the third-losingest pro sports city in America. [FTW]

DMV: It’s Dallas Week

Plenty of Washington football news, but focus: It’s Dallas Week. [ESPN]

Dez Bryant has bigger name, but is Pierre Garçon as good? [RR]

D-Hall, Skins have much to play for this week, 1 game out. [CSNW]

Cold blooded headline for Nats season: World Series or Bust. [NE]

Braden Holtby has been out and about signing a baby. Yep. [RMNB]

Good sign that Nene is already talking about playing less minutes? [CSNW]

Turgeon thinks Terps could be a “more complete” team. [Testudo Times]

Ricky Williams compares his weed habit to Popeye’s spinach habit. [FTW]

For the folks who watched League of Denial, live chat with authors at 6. [DS]

DMV: Peter King Breaks Down Skins Chances

Barry Cofield practices w boxing glove-like club on his hand, is tough. [RR]

Good read on Leonard Hankerson’s adjustment to pro football, family. [WT]

Fred Davis plans revenge on NFL that wanted to sign him for cheap. [Bog]

Interesting look at the aging, most famous Skins fan Chief Zee. [WP]

Twitter beef between Bryce Harper and Ian Desmond over bus rides. [NE]

Nats win in Philly last night, but that curly W had plenty of warts. [NI]

Mike Morse in Baltimore uni. Who gets parental rights to Take On Me? [NE]

Orioles come up short despite 9th inning rally last night in Cleveland. [CC]

After 15 years of sellouts, looks like Hokies have extras for sale. [WP]

Playboy takes a look at the proper age for men to stop smoking grass. [PB]

Nats Have Lost Focus, If They Ever Had It

The biggest problem with last night’s bullshit “brawl” was the Nats clearly have lost focus. Maybe lost focus is putting it mildly, because based on a 54-59 season that has the team 14.5 games back in early August, it’s arguable the team lacked focus from the beginning.

But back to last night.

Harper hit a bomb off Braves starter Julio Teheran, and Harper took a few seconds to enjoy it. Everyone who’s watched baseball for a little while knows what happens next: Harper’s getting hit. This is the rule of the land, like getting boo’d wearing an Eagles jersey in the FedEx parking lots.

Don’t lie to yourself and say Harper didn’t show up Teheran, he did, we all saw it.

Continue reading

DMV: Who Made The Clown Move?

Nats lose but story is Bryce Harper HBP after HR, jawing at pitcher. [NE]

Even with Bryce excitement Nats still can’t beat Braves, fall 14.5 back. [NI]

Meanwhile on the Left Coast, O’s win, stay in hunt for AL Wild Card. [CSNB]

Adam Jones gives great performance in San Diego homecoming. [CC]

Not to be outdone, Orioles got in on Twitter clowning last night too. [WWW]

Good thing Raul Ibanez can hit, bc this is the worst throw of all throws. [DS]

If you haven’t seen Peyton & Eli rap yet, this is your chance. [FTW]

Kirk Cousins not sure how much he will play Thursday night vs Titans. [WP]

Stars, they’re just like us: Santana drove crappy car in college. [Redskins]

Being haters, the NFL will now flag Alfred Morris’ HR swing. [Yahoo]

Training camp shows Skins want breakout for Aldrick Robinson. [CSNW]

Wizards schedule released last night, looks tough early, soft late. [BF]

Aug. 11-18 is DC Beer Week, looking for tips to best events. [DCBW]