Category Archives: Redskins Name Change

18 New Redskins Names Inspired By Marvel Comics

Comic book guy

We’re approaching the point where literally every person in America with a soapbox of any kind will have weighed in on the Redskins name. As part of staking their flag into a small square of this hotly disputed rhetorical soil, most of those people will suggest possible alternate names. Eighty-five percent of those names will be the goddamned potato joke, and the remaining 15 percent will be terrible.

The current front-runner for worst in the clubhouse comes from Fortune Magazine managing editor Andy Serwer, who suggests in a Politico column (for a section of the site, it’s worth noting, that is literally called “Soapbox”) that the team be renamed the Washington All-Americans.

Serwer’s argument hinges on three points. First, the obvious squishy liberal inclusiveness the name implies. Second, “All-American” has a positive connotation in a sports context. And third … well, I’ll let him tell it:

I did some digging around and discovered that “All-American” used to be an obscure Marvel comic book super hero back in the 1980s. And get this, he was a football player! The All-American character was ‘really’ Giovanni “Jack” Magniconte, star quarterback of the fictional New York Smashers, nicknamed “Mr. Magnificent” by the press.

And … yeah. Hoo boy. Using this as an argument for choosing a team name is like naming your baby “Ishtar” because it was the title of a big-budget movie with some big-name stars. Let me get my geekhat on so we can do a deep nerd-dive on this.

Magniconte was the star of a doomed book called Kickers Inc., which was one of the launch titles in an equally doomed Marvel sub-imprint called the New Universe. Launched in 1986, the New Universe was meant to be “the world outside your window!” — a more realistic look at people with super powers running in something like realtime, basically — as an attempt to recapture the IP-generating lightning in a bottle that was the launch of the original Marvel Universe 25-ish years prior.

Kickers Inc. was arguably the stupidest book in the line, and was one of four launch titles canceled at the end of its first year. The imprint as a whole lasted just two more years, flailing around in increasing desperation before being mothballed. In those two years, Magniconte resurfaced as a supporting character whose role is basically “government stooge.” Not exactly a pop-culture icon to name a football team after.

Just to drive the final nerd-nail into the coffin of this idea, there’s this: The New Universe popped back up in 2008 as an even grittier “re-imagining” of the concept. This time around, Magniconte’s powers manifest while he’s on the field mid-game, which results in a graphic, on-panel depiction of him stiff-arming a dude so hard that he explodes in a spray of guts and bones. This is EXACTLY the kind of association the NFL is trying to draw in these days of concussion awareness and increased player safety concerns. (For a fun thought experiment, try to imagine the league’s earnest “don’t use super-powers on-field” ad campaign following that disaster!)

In summary, the “Washington All-Americans” idea is every bit as terrible as you think it is, and dragging in this stupid Marvel reference only makes it worse.

Which is not to say that the idea of borrowing some of the names or concepts from the Marvel Universe is inherently terrible. Here are 18 other Marvel-inspired potential names that are marginally less awful, or, at least, better thought-out. Continue reading

Dan Snyder Is Hardline On Redskins Name Change, Even By 1972 Standards

Dan Steinberg did the good service of curating 40-plus-year-old newspaper clips about the Redskins name-change issue. While the material rings familiar to those following the modern debate, which is kind of the point, this bit is noticeably different.

In response to protests from American Indian groups, then-owner Edward Bennett Williams modified the more cloying lyrics to “Hail to the Redskins” and changed “psuedo-Indian” outfits the Redskinettes wore at the time. He also had this to say:

“All the reaction I’ve received on the nickname question has been unsympathetic to the protesting Indian groups. We would not carry a symbol offensive to any group. No one has persuaded me that the Redskins, as a symbol of our football team, is offensive.”

“Had I been persuaded,” Williams added, “we would have taken action accordingly.”

Williams stressed that he doesn’t have a “closed mind” on the subject.

That was 1972. Now, contrast it with what Dan Snyder told USA TODAY Sports last year:

“We will never change the name of the team. As a lifelong Redskins fan, and I think that the Redskins fans understand the great tradition and what it’s all about and what it means, so we feel pretty fortunate to be just working on next season.”

What if his football team loses an ongoing federal trademark lawsuit? Would he consider changing it then?

“We’ll never change the name,” he said. “It’s that simple. NEVER — you can use caps.”

Seasons change, as do owners. The name does not.

George Wallace, Jesse Helms and Strom Thurmond On ‘Redskins’ (GUEST POST)

Here with a not-at-all incendiary guest post for winning our Redskins-Lions Prediction contest is Jon.

First off, I’d like to thank Jamie for giving me the opportunity to write a little something about our beloved Washington Football Team. I have to apologize, though. I couldn’t come up with a #hottake on the state of the team. All I have is this transcript of George Wallace, Jesse Helms and Strom Thurmond talking about the name change down in Hell (way to drop the ball, Steinz).

Take it away, boys!

Governor Wallace: What’s this bullshit about the liberal media trying to change the name from the Redskins to some stupid name like the Griffins or Warriors?

Senator Helms: I don’t know, George. This country is going straight to hell. There’s not enough troops in the Army to force true Redskins fans to change the name and allow shitty names like the Warriors, Griffins or Renegades into our stadium, into our practice facility, into our Joe Gibbs Memorial Bubble, into our fancy new training facility in the capitol of our Confederacy or into our homes!

Senator Thurmond: HOOWEE, I’m with you on that one, Jesse! You know, I think the Redskins Name Guardians are the greatest minority in this nation! They deserve consideration and understanding instead of the persecution of twisted Costasian propaganda.

Governor Wallace: Amen, Strom. Amen. If I was the owner, I’d resist any calls for changing the name, even to the point of standing at the stadium gates in person, if necessary.

Senator Thurmond: I’d do exactly the same, George. It’s not that I’m prejudiced against Native Americans. When I was governor, I did more to help the Native Americans in our state than any previous governor, and I think you can find Native Americans in the state who will attest to this fact.

Senator Helms: Like that Indian chief Mister Snyder found in Alaska, right??? I love that guy!

Continue reading

Some Alt Redskins Logos To Go With Some Alt Redskins Names

Dan Snyder trademarked the name “Warriors” in 2000* and has squatted on the name ever since. Now, thanks to design firm 99 Designs, here’s what the Washington Warriors could look like:

I don’t know why the mil-bro is so damn, well, red-faced, but he does look pretty bad-ass. As does this paler version, so long as you steer clear of the gold helmet:

Click through to FTW for additional versions of the “Renegades” and “Griffins” logos, even if those names are not advised. And there are many, many more at 99 Designs.

* Reader Matt Brown emails to clarify this Warriors trademark business:

“You can’t squat on a trademark for decades on end and not do anything with [it]. After a period of time, the US Patent & Trademark Office will consider the trademark ‘abandoned’ and throw it back into the free market. The Redskins’ 2000 submission for Washington Warriors expired in 2004. The Arena Football League submitted a claim for Washington Warriors in 2007, and that mark expired in 2009.

There is a claim for just ‘Warriors’ that the Redskins own related to football entertainment and merchandise, but without ‘Washington’ attached to it. That was submitted in 2007, and the claim on the mark is still alive. They tried to trademark ‘Skins’ in 1997 but lost that within the year. They tried again in 1999 but that was abandoned in 2005.”

DMV: Rick Reilly Is Pro-’Redskins’

Rick Reilly wrote about Redskins name change. (He’s against it.) [ESPN]

And then Reilly’s column got absolutely eviscerated. [KSK, Dave Zirin]

Peter Berg said Theismann said the Hogs used to smoke at halftime. [Bog]

The Skins’ 0-2 start isn’t that bad. 0-3 is, though. [Staying Medium]

Jordan Reed got more snaps than Fred Davis in Week 2. [Real Redskins]

Brandon Meriweather fined $42k for his hit on Eddie Lacy. [The Insider]

O’s win in 12 on Crush Davis two-out single. One back. [Camden Chat]

Nats lose to Braves. Cincy wins in 13. 5.5 back. 10 to play. [Nats Insider]

Kilgore subtly takes Olbmermann behind the woodshed. [Nats Journal]

Strasburg scratched again due to lingering forearm issues. [Nats Insider]

The Caps played in Baltimore and someone threw a crab on the ice. [Bog]

Diggs has the best odds of any WR to win the Heisman. [Testudo Times]

Terps to wear new red Maryland Pride uniforms Saturday. [Terps Insider]

The Most Ridiculous Result From That WaPo ‘Redskins’ Poll

The Washington Post polled 1,106 D.C.-area residents about the Washington football team’s nickname, and the big takeaways are “61 percent [of Washingtonians] say they like the team’s name” and “among those who want to keep the Redskins’ name, 56 percent say they feel the word ‘redskin’ is inappropriate.”

That first result is predictable, and the second is pure comedy, though Chris Chase explains it away as pure apathy. (“This isn’t a big deal to most people.” Fair enough.)

Another common-sense result was “around 8 in 10 Redskins fans and non-fans alike say changing the name would not affect their support for the team.” That sounds about right, but the flip side is:

“Among avid sports fans who have strongly favorable impressions of the Redskins, 15 percent say they would be less of a fan of the team if it were to change its name.”

Really?! These people would “be less of a fan” if the Redskins became the Skins (short for Pigskins) or the Warriors or the Hogs or whatever. These 15 percent — or approximately 166 people — would “be less of a fan” if the name of their preferred sports team was no longer an “inappropriate way to describe a Native American Indian.” They’d stop sympathizing with Larry Michael and Dan Snyder, or whatever it is knuckle-dragging Redskins fans do, which is fine, because those in this sub-set are the worst fans of anything anywhere.

Of course, you could literally change the name to the Washington Whatevers and I’d root for them the same. I just don’t want my team’s name to be described by the dictionary as “usually offensive.” But there’s no winning this argument. It’ll just be over one day.

(Reminder: We have a Washington “Football Team” shirt for some of you.)

Introducing A T-Shirt Celebrating The Washington ‘Football Team’

I’m not going to conduct a poll about it, and I’m not going to target-question American Indians, but I will venture to say some Washington football fans are uncomfortable with the team’s name. I know because I’m one of them.

So we partnered with Sneeki’s Tees, which designs awesome D.C. sports stuff, to make a T-shirt that a progressive Redskins fan can wear without having a racial slur across his/her chest. Consider it an act of silent, wearable protest. Plus, it’s a pretty good-looking shirt.

Get the high-quality, super-comfortable tee now in burgundy, black or white for just $24, and wear it with pride. I prefer burgundy myself.