ESPN's Finest
« Previous Entries Next Entries »Defending Albert Haynesworth Yet Again: He’s Playing About 75% of the Snaps
Thursday, October 29th, 2009I was unfortunate enough to have ESPN’s Monday Night Countdown on in the background before the embarrassment at FedEx this week. The “analysts” — Mike Ditka, Keyshawn Johnson, Cris Carter, Tom Jackson — started the show by taking turns shitting on the Redskins via the infinite wisdom they’ve acquired from having played or coached the [...]
Cris Carter Is Really Smart So We Should Take His Campbell-Bashing Seriously
Tuesday, October 6th, 2009ESPN’s Cris Carter, who is an EXPERT ANALYST on all things National Football League, had this to say about Campbell’s performance on Sunday:
Three take-aways from this analysis:
1) “Syncness”: The Redskins need more of it. It would help if this was a real fucking thing. But we can’t sweat the details. We just need to figure [...]
Wale Reps the Capital on ESPN First Take
Thursday, May 7th, 2009D.C.-area rapper Wale, the (un)official recording artist of Mr. Irrelevant, showed up on “First Take” this morning to discuss the Caps and sometime namesake Alex Ovechkin, subjects he knows intimately.
With any luck, video and an in-depth look from Dan Steinberg are to come. In the meantime, these are the highlights:
“Hockey is like professional wrestling, minus [...]
Scott Van Pelt Learns the Hard Way to Keep My Name Out His Mouf
Tuesday, February 10th, 2009Perhaps you’ve heard that ESPN decided to give Scott Van Pelt, one of about three ESPN personalities worth a shit, some time off. They’ll have you believe the reason for the suspension is that his comments about Bud Selig on his radio show recently were too harsh. Not true. The real reason is that he [...]
ESPN Interactive Tuesday and Maryland Terrapins Basketball Continue to Suck
Tuesday, January 27th, 2009The Sporting Blog torched ESPN Interactive Tuesday during football season, but tonight’s Terps game got the treatment, so take it away, Maryland sports correspondent Andy Peden:
“What’s worse than Mike Patrick doing a MD game? It’s Interactive Tuesday on ESPN where stupid people are allowed to have their comments scrolling across the top of the [...]
That Must’ve Been Fun for Gary Williams
Saturday, January 24th, 2009What’s worse than your favorite college basketball team losing to its hated rival by 41? Your favorite college basketball team losing to its hated rival by 41 with Mike Patrick calling the game.
We’ve laid into the Vienna resident plenty of times, and, considering we share an optometrist (shout-out to Dr. Snively!), I don’t feel good [...]
Kiper Says the Skins Are Taking This Guy
Friday, January 23rd, 2009Mel Kiper has released his first 2009 first round mock draft (via Shutdown Corner), and has the Skins taking Texas defensive end Brian Orakpo at No. 13. Hogs Haven has this to say:
“I’m rather confused with this pick since Jason Taylor and Andre Carter are both still Redskins at this point.”
Unless that’s a joke, it’s [...]
You’re With Me, Double-Breasted Suit
Wednesday, November 12th, 2008As a sports blogger, it’s part of my makeup to loathe Chris Berman and the punny nicknames he hands out like so many Chinese food samples at the Tyson’s Corner food court. Like bad sesame chicken, there’s not much Jake “Daylight Come and You Gotta” Delhomme one can take before something wicked this way comes.
But [...]
‘Hip Hip Hooray’ Gets Kenny Mayne’d
Monday, October 13th, 2008This is bittersweet after losing to St. Louis, when staying medium trumps hip hip hooraying, but anytime the Mayne Event comes to Redskins Park, it’s probably worth sharing. So for those of you who missed Sunday Countdown due to allergic reactions to Chris Berman, here it is (via The Bald Spot):
Highlights include ARE and co. [...]
On Zorn Playing His Starters and the Only Redskins Position Battle That Matters
Tuesday, August 26th, 2008“It sounds like Redskins head coach Jim Zorn is about to break an unwritten — and wise — code in the final game of the preseason: He’s going to try to win.“ — ESPN blogger Matt Mosley
I’m not sure how Mr. Mosley reaches his final verdict, but it is true that Zorn Star may play [...]