Handing out labels following Skins games, this one a 21-13 loss to Carolina.
Me — I spent most of this game grilling and eating seafood and pouring and drinking good beer, so it didn’t hurt like it should have. That said, there will be no other winners this week, even FroMo and the new kicker who can’t miss.
Mike Shanahan — Awesome at losing “must-win” games in early November. This one wasn’t even close, despite the Panthers entering as a one-win team and tons of Skins alumni being in the house. What an embarrassment.
The entire defense — Zero sacks. Zero turnovers. Two 90-plus-yard TD drives, 8.7 yards/pass to Cam Newton and 5.5 yards/rush to Jonathan Stewart and DeAngelo Williams. Ex-App St. QB Armanti Edwards (one career NFL reception) caught an 82-yarder. Stinks on ice.
Brandon Banks — Shitty on kick returns (18.3 per), even worse on punts (-2.0 per) and worse still receiving the ball (-7 yards). I don’t know what that final play was.
Bruce Allen — The whole “homecoming” thing, which gave the Panthers extra motivation, was silly to begin with. This isn’t college. No one matriculated at Redskins University, except for maybe the brothers Allen.
(Note: The pregame huddle with Sean Taylor’s dad was cool, though.)
All of the receivers — RGIII just doesn’t have anybody to throw to.
The throwbacks — They looked good on the field, but the sideline gear was mustard-colored ugly. Plus they lost, so.