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Redskins-Chiefs Winners & Losers
By Jamie Mottram | October 18, 2009
LOSERS
The Kansas City Chiefs — I know it was Todd Haley’s first win, and it must’ve felt great for all involved, but a Gatorade shower? We’re all laughing at you, though probably not as hard as you’re laughing at us.
The Washington Redskins — This was the most depressing game ever. Even worse than Detroit because a) the Chiefs are just as bad, b) it came at home, c) it knocked Washington to 2-4 after the easiest six-game schedule in NFL history, d) the quarterback was benched and e) it ensures Philly will have a home game at FedEx next Monday night.
Jim Zorn — The play-calling was atrocious, I can’t believe he benched JC and he might not make it to won’t be calling plays on Monday night.
Danny Smith — Let us count his unit’s fail: 1) Had a punt blocked. 2) Forced the offense into a 36-yard Hail Mary. 3) Committed a crucial personal foul on a punt return. 4) Averaged 31.8 yards per punt. 5) Averaged 19 yards per kick return. 6) Antwaan Randle El, punt returner.
Jason Campbell — Struggling first half (9-16, 89 yards, Hail Mary INT).
Todd Collins — Struggling second half (6-14, 75 yards, fumbled snap).
Vinny Cerrato and the offensive line — Just read this.
Clinton Portis — Broke off a career-long 78-yard run (with Mike Sellers blocking all the way) but got nothing else all day long and coughed up a momentum-killing fumble on the opening drive.
CBS — Ian Eagle was excellent as usual, and Rich Gannon is okay, but the broadcast actually blacked out for five minutes of the third quarter.
WINNERS
This guy — As seen by Steinz. And these guys too. Them too.
Brian Orakpo — The defensive ROY candidate gets another sack, marking his fourth straight game with 0.5 or more.
Andre Carter — Picks up two more sacks, has 5.5 already.
Albert Haynesworth — You have to wonder how many of the sacks are thanks to Hanynesworth. The guy, despite collapsing in pain (exhaustion?) every game, is a dominating force.
Chris Cooley – After being shutout in Carolina, it was good seeing him catch five for 57.
The Kansas City Star — They don’t print “Redskins.” Good for them.
Topics: Infinite Sadness, Redskins, Winners & Losers | 13 Comments »
October 18th, 2009 at 9:14 PM
Winner: Jerry Gray, about to get a pay raise.
October 18th, 2009 at 9:20 PM
How does that work, promoting a position coach over his coordinator? Kind of like hiring a position coach to be coordinator and then naming him head coach two weeks later, I guess.
October 18th, 2009 at 9:53 PM
dickdog tries to figure out what’s wrong with the skins: http://www.adventuresofdickdog.com/?p=276
October 18th, 2009 at 10:46 PM
Losers:
Me – Today’s my birthday and this was the gift the Skins gave me.
Sonny Jurgensen – Kept talking about how much better we’d be with Collins in the game, how’d that 2nd half work out for you Sonny?
Medium:
Devin Thomas – Getting really good at making great catches 3 yards out of bounds.
October 18th, 2009 at 11:57 PM
That interview with Cerrato is a joke right? Im almost excited to see how bad Redskins management can make this.
October 19th, 2009 at 12:21 AM
Losers: My parents for raising me as a Skins fan and instilling loyalty in me so I’m doomed to get my heart broken week after week and still have love and hope for a future.
October 19th, 2009 at 5:45 AM
Winner:
Succop. His named is pronounced in such a way you have to know his elementary school years were terrific… But really he is a winner for kicking four field goals despite being 2009’s… wait for it… Mr. Irrelevant.
Boosh!
October 19th, 2009 at 7:56 AM
Winner: Rush Limbaugh. I’d take him as an NFL owner right now, especially if he promised to dump Cerrato.
October 19th, 2009 at 9:46 AM
@Jake:
“Losers:
Sonny Jurgensen – Kept talking about how much better we’d be with Collins in the game, how’d that 2nd half work out for you Sonny?”
They scored six points. Better than zero in the first half. So it worked out considerably better. Which is to say “bad” is better than “awful.”
“Medium:
Devin Thomas – Getting really good at making great catches 3 yards out of bounds.”
He had to make the catch out of bounds because of Campbell’s horrible throw. It was a great catch though.
October 19th, 2009 at 9:55 AM
Losers:
Me – Wearing a Jason Campbell jersey my girl bought me before the Skins/Steelers game to a Philly-area bar in which I had to watch the second half of a game with it on. The best part was walking out with absolutely no doubt that I will ever wear this jersey and not consider myself a prime target for straightcashhomey.net fandom.
Can we all just get on the Saints bandwagon already?
October 19th, 2009 at 10:37 AM
I don’t know that Collins did better or worse than Campbell. Sure, they scored six after a scoreless first half, but Campbell led them to 16 after a scoreless first two weeks ago. So who knows what he would’ve done this time around?
My point, as laid out in the Loverro post, is that there’s no reason to play Collins. And I guess there’s no reason to play Campbell either, so long as you’ve given up on him.
Whatever, neither can do anything with this line, those receivers and that playcalling.
October 19th, 2009 at 11:09 AM
@Chris
Collins was worse then Campbell but had the benefit of a 78 yard Portis run. I suspect Jamie’s point is right, Campbell’s shown he can overcome awful first half’s before.
And I’m not saying it was Thomas’ fault he was out of bounds, just that he seems to catch those one’s rather then the Carolina game bomb that was inbounds.
October 19th, 2009 at 11:49 AM
I’m in the tank for JC, although it’s obvious that the front office has no faith in him or intention to keep him. I don’t even think JC intends to resign next year, and if I were his agent, I wouldn’t let him.
Zach Miller > Clinton Portis
Go watch Clinton’s 78 yard run, then go watch Miller’s 86 yard td catch. I can’t believe Portis didn’t punch in that run, Sellers paved the way, and Portis basically tried to outrun him the whole way down the field instead of making any type of move to utilize Sellers as a blocker. Miller, a fucking TE, makes a move that Portis should be able to do in his sleep to get to the end zone.