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Look How Scared Clinton Portis Is
By Chris Mottram | November 19, 2008
As you likely know, we’re coming up on the one year anniversary of Sean Taylor’s death. So, in honor of the occasion, ESPN the mag has decided to put together a comprehensive look at just how scary it is to be a professional football player.
The feature is broken into eight different parts, each written by a different player (and one by the Broncos security dude), who discusses his fears. Or something like that. I’ve actually only read the intro to Ben Roethlisberger’s section, which mentioned something about BBQ sauce making Ben scared, and the part by Clinton Portis, which features this choice nugget (note: they left in the poor grammar, that’s how you know CP wrote this shit):
Lots of people getting humble, but an athlete’s money is constant. …
I was at a charity event the other night and I had a man come up to me and grab me, hard, as if we were close friends. It was one of those hard grabs, around the neck, the way people who don’t know you shouldn’t touch you. So I turned around looking at him like, uh, do I know you? And his response was “I pay your salary, I’m a season ticket holder.” Now, what do season tickets cost? Twenty thousand dollars? Pay my salary? Man, I don’t make $20,000.
I worked hard for what I got. This life wasn’t given to me. It wasn’t eenie, meanie, miney, mo: I win. I’ve been fighting for what I got my whole life and it was hard work. I’ve seen everything. I’ve lost family members. I’ve held an AK-47, I’ve held assault rifles. I’ve seen crack sitting beside me. I’ve seen cocaine sitting beside me. But I stayed clean and found a way to steer myself away from all that. People are upset with me because I’m successful? You should try being successful too.
In case you weren’t paying attention, that first sentence translates directly to mean “Portis pockets straight.” And I’m not sure what this “success” stuff is, but I’d love to hear more about crack, if you’d care to expound, Mr. Portis.
Topics: Clinton Portis, Redskins |
5 Responses to “Look How Scared Clinton Portis Is”
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November 19th, 2008 at 4:54 pm
$20K? The two seats in my name (since 2001) cost $912 for both with tax and fees included.
I successfuly paid for one of Casey Rabachs penalties this season.
November 19th, 2008 at 5:13 pm
1. Those are the benefits of being the Mayor.
2. I’m with Portis on this one. Dude’s 20 stacks don’t amount up to a half of football for Portis, or all the crap he has to put up with. Like dealing with Brian Mitchell, and modeling Mr. Irrelevant wear on demand.
November 19th, 2008 at 5:24 pm
My tickets are in section 442 row 17 seats 1 and 2. The face value is $44. The guys above me in row 20 seats 1 and 2 have a face value of $69. Thats 25 bucks more. I never sit in those seats cause I work the craigslist circuit or the lot or get lowers from CBS(free) but I always keep them so I am guarenteed playoff tickets.
November 19th, 2008 at 8:17 pm
CP is the man indeed, but the whole “why don’t you just be successful” line loses a little bit of punch considering that CP was blessed from the get-go with a very unnatural athletic ability. I mean I love the guy but I don’t think he’s Ph.D material.
November 19th, 2008 at 9:30 pm
He went to The U, I’m pretty sure that they give out doctorates for successfully holding a AK-47 and not killing yourself.