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Burn it to the Effing Ground
By Chris Mottram | October 30, 2008
None of us are pleased about this. Seeing Philly fans happy, with something to celebrate is … well … it’s something I’ve actually never witnessed in my lifetime. But I know I don’t like it. Not one bit. So, if you’re like me, and you have hate in your heart, let it out. While the rest of the sporting corner of the internet is joyously taking the Phillies balls deep (I mean, really? and really?), consider this your therapeutic little retreat. We’re in the trust tree and nothing said in the comments section is too vulgar, angry or bitter.
Also, if you’re like most of my friends and honestly had no idea the Phillies clinched the World Series last night, you’re probably all “WTF?” right now. Let me relate this to your lives: The city of Philadephia won a championship. You hate them. Proceed.
(Photo taken with love from Jim MacMillian who has several other money shots from last night.)
Topics: Anger!, Die, Douchebags, Philly Sucks | 21 Comments »
October 30th, 2008 at 10:55 AM
At least it’s not the Eagles.
October 30th, 2008 at 11:08 AM
Who the fuck thinks more suspended games would be a good idea? Honestly?
And yes, this blows. If Cole Hamels wasn’t so gorgeous, I’d be really upset.
October 30th, 2008 at 11:28 AM
I used some pretty reprehensible language last night when describing my feelings about Philly fans to a Philly fan. It didn’t help that the Wiz looked fucking terrible against a pathetic New Jersey team and got smoked by none other than Jarvis Hayes. What a terrible night. The Skins better win on Monday or I’m picking a fight with the first Eagles jersey I see. You’ll know it’s me b/c I’ll be the guy at Bailey’s (ugh) sitting in front to the left w/ bloody knuckles standing over a guy, appropriately striking a post-hit Sean Taylor pose in my ST jersey.
hate hate hate hate
October 30th, 2008 at 11:33 AM
On the plus side, I can now hate Philly fans for being self-righteous douchebags as well as self-pitying douchebags. At least a 4-1 series win forestalled the abortion that is November baseball. And, like Jamie said, the Iggles still haven’t won jack.
October 30th, 2008 at 11:52 AM
Everything about Philly sports pretty much sucks, though we can take solace in the fact that the Eagles will never win the Super Bowl. Never.
About the thing that Philly has over DC are its strip clubs. In that department, they are in the Super Bowl while DC is still playing Pop Warner. Don’t even try to argue that one.
October 30th, 2008 at 12:04 PM
My friend last night asked me if at least I could appreciate the Phillies winning because they have a more dedicated fanbase.
Me: “No, I fucking hate everything Philadelphia.”
Friend: “But come on, Tampa? Their fans suck.”
Me: “I don’t care. If Satan fielded a team and they played Philly, I would root for Satan.”
October 30th, 2008 at 12:07 PM
Nothing pisses me off more than the “our fanbase rulz, their’s sux” argument. Wow, the team that’s been around 100+ years has a larger number of dedicated fans than the one that’s been around a decade? Well, if that’s the case, then shit, they totally deserve it more.
October 30th, 2008 at 12:55 PM
Fuck me sideways with a lunchbox.
I hate everything Philly. Ugliest city in America.
October 30th, 2008 at 12:56 PM
I prefer my Philly fan bitter, angry and defeated. The Phillies will give them a shot of confidence but when the Eagles and Sixers miss the playoffs they’ll come back to normal.
October 30th, 2008 at 1:04 PM
They can put this trophy right next to their lombardi’s
/shows self out
October 30th, 2008 at 1:05 PM
/reuses old commenting meme
//knows their is something funny about X and Y but can’t decide what it is
///is > philly fans > boston fans
October 30th, 2008 at 1:13 PM
Since we’re in the trust tree, I say Fuck ‘em!
October 30th, 2008 at 1:13 PM
At least we can agree that their cheesesteaks are boss over wings and mumbo sauce.
But not by much.
October 30th, 2008 at 2:07 PM
I refuse to give anything about philthy philly props over DC. Strip clubs and cheese steaks are still better here.
You know why? B/c they’re not in Philly.
Anything good, pleasant or enjoyable is divided by 10 when it’s happening in Philly.
October 30th, 2008 at 2:20 PM
D.C. strip clubs don’t hold a candle to B-more stip clubs.
Once you get past the stab and bullet wounds on the ladies.
October 30th, 2008 at 4:02 PM
Yes, Bmore “stip” clubs are better. Whatever the fuck they are.
October 30th, 2008 at 4:05 PM
Oh snap, Stet. He got you on that typo, yo.
October 30th, 2008 at 6:19 PM
Flyers fans are the worst too. Always show up to Caps games, and obnoxious as hell.
October 31st, 2008 at 2:40 AM
Cockfuckles. I hope Philly gets Katrina’d. I hope you all drown you pigshitting ass-pirates.
November 3rd, 2008 at 3:05 AM
World Fucking Champions.
November 3rd, 2008 at 9:09 AM
Wow, Enrico. I mean, I was blown away by how clever that line was when Utley delivered to thousands of douchebags, but it’s taken on a whole new level of originality now that you’ve repeated it here in the comments section of a blog three days later. Well played, sir.