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Let’s Make a Deal, Mr. Portis
By Chris Mottram | September 25, 2008
Ever the cunning entrepreneurs, we decided to create shirts that read “Portis Pockets Straight” last week, a quote from Clinton’s-air tiff with Brian Mitchell. Apparently, word got back to the folks at The John Thompson Show, who yesterday had this exchange during their weekly interview with CP:
Thompson: You know what I did Clinton after the show was over? I ran in and told the boss that I spurred them two fools on, give me some more money. I look at it purely from the standpoint of dollars. Don’t get angry; get money. Get paid.
Al Koken: See, John’s keeping his pockets straight too Clinton!
Thompson: That’s right. I liked that one though. That was a pretty one. Everybody in the street asked me, “What does keeping your pockets straight mean?” I said, “What I been trying to do!”
Koken: But Clinton, with all this, now somebody’s putting a t-shirt out with this on it!
Thompson: What, keeping your pockets straight?
Koken: Yeah, you should have gotten a taste of that.
Portis: They need to cut me in on it.
Thompson: Nah baby, me first. I’ll break you off a little something something.
Before we proceed, this must be said: Al Koken is the whitest man on earth.
Okay, now let’s negotiate, Clinton. We are prepared to make you the following offer: The Brothers Mottram will send you one “Portis Pockets Straight” t-shirt, free of charge, which you will in turn model for the blog. Sorry, model’s the wrong word. You will wear it and allow Matt Terl, the Redskins blogger, to take photos of you doing so. Once we have said photos in our possession, you will receive your compensation, which shall be 10% of total profits we make from the shirts or $4.50, whichever is more.
Do we have a deal, Mr. Portis?
(Huge thanks to Tom Ziller for the photoshop work.)
Topics: Clinton Portis, High Fashion, Redskins | 10 Comments »
September 25th, 2008 at 11:18 AM
$4.50?
Your pockets way straighter than mine off the blogging tip.
September 25th, 2008 at 11:23 AM
I love Smokin’ Al. That man is a D.C. institution.
September 25th, 2008 at 11:24 AM
@Stet: Well, $4.50 will be way more than 10% of the profits. I’m just trying to make the deal a little sexier for Portis.
September 25th, 2008 at 11:33 AM
I know the Mottram’s pockets are strait.
Now
But are they going to stay strait?
If someone puts your pockets in the fire will you be able to douse them with water to cool everyone off?
You have to think long term in this economy.
September 25th, 2008 at 11:54 AM
Hey then you could have a shirt of portis with the shirt on, get him to take a photo of that and go with a whol Landolakes butter thing.
September 25th, 2008 at 12:24 PM
What, are you guys made of money?
September 25th, 2008 at 1:38 PM
You guys do phenomenally well with these bootsy Spreadshirts. Step your game up to CafePress, son!
September 25th, 2008 at 2:14 PM
Studio One Printing > Cafe Press > SpreadShirt
Stuidio One Printing is the official clothier of the DTC and The Mayor of FedEx Field.
http://studiooneprinting.com/
Good friends of mine, seriously they will hook you up if you drop my name.
They made those Hate The Mayor, Not The Game tees.
The HOF 2008 tees.
And the most popular ones right now, the DTC RUNS FEDEX FIELD joints.
I got one in the works right now that says….
MR. RELEVANT
September 25th, 2008 at 2:27 PM
I think Spreadshirt seems to be working just fine, but thank you all for your concern.
(Actually, I have no idea if it’s working fine. Jamie mans the t-shirt shop. I just accept my cut in the mail.)
September 28th, 2008 at 2:30 AM
Smokin Al and Mitt Romney should duke it out to see who’s whiter.
Winner gets a sandwich made with Wonder Bread, Kraft Singles, and Miracle Whip. And yes, the crusts will be cut off.