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CBS’ Seth Davis Is King of the Neg-Burn
By Jamie Mottram | March 29, 2008
In this country there is problem, and that problem is the Neg-Burn (or Negative Sideburn). The late-20th century epidemic is diminishing but still widespread in the deep south and midwest, and its peoples have a champion in smarmy CBS analyst and master Clark Kellogg debater Seth Davis.
If you don’t see a problem there, you may have one yourself and should probably consult Joe Sports Fan’s explanation of the Neg-Burn:
“Simply put, the Negative Sideburn is achieved when one elects to shave their sideburns above the ear line. Picture someone putting on a pair of glasses, then proceeding to take a straight razor and lopping off all hair beneath the ear piece. If you run across Neg-Burns in the wild, be cautious, as they are typically aggressive. You don’t shave your burns that high without an attitude to back it up.”
What’s even more absurd is that the Neg-Burn contrasts with Mr. Davis’ MO, which is to wax slick in opposition of Mr. Kellogg’s look of confusion. All well and good, but he needs to let those sideburns breathe, lest he continue looking like an early ’90s, Mississippi-bred Brett Favre.
(I could also do without the Team America pin while he’s at it, but that’s more of a personal thing than a PSA. Less war, more basketball.)
Topics: College Hoops, Great Hair, Media Bird Doggin', High Fashion |
3 Responses to “CBS’ Seth Davis Is King of the Neg-Burn”
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March 29th, 2008 at 11:04 am
But the pin is on the left side! That means he’s with us, right?
Living in the south, it’s been my experience that anyone who went to an SEC school has two options: neg burns, or huge chops. Seth went to Duke, so clearly he is just confused.
March 29th, 2008 at 11:51 am
You guys are just jealous of Bullis.
March 29th, 2008 at 5:23 pm
Maj, your knowledge of local private schools continues to astound.