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Is Tennis Better Than College Football?
By Chris Mottram | September 5, 2007
Scoop Jackson gives us 25 reasons why he thinks the answer to that question is “yes.” For me, it’s a tough call. It’s my favorite sport to play (tennis) vs. my favorite sport to watch (football)*. Ultimately, NCAA football is better than tennis. However, what I viewed from the U.S. Open this weekend was far superior to anything I saw on the gridiron, probably because I couldn’t watch Michigan-App. State.
Having said that, some of Scoop’s 25 reasons are just stupid (granted, the column is clearly supposed to be a little “silly”). Examples include, but are certainly not limited to the following:
7. Because as cute as Ian Johnson and Chrissy Popadics’ story is, they’ll never match Andre Agassi and Steffi Graf’s. 11. Serena in black. 12. Roger Federer plays tennis and no one in college football is close to being that good. 23. Because women receive equal pay. (Oops, there are no women in college football.)
Far too easy rebuttals: Andre and Steffi is just weird, not cute. Serena is — for the millionth time — not even remotely attractive, let alone being as hot as just about any cheerleader seen on the sidelines on Saturday (like these ladies, for example). Federer is incredible, but he could never do this. Women receive equal pay as men in college football too, which is to say they both get nothing. Unless they go to Ohio State.
*Further complicating things is that baseball is my favorite all-around sport. Does that make any sense?
(Pictured is Ana Ivanovic, who is the best of all of Scoop’s reasons.)
Update: Fire Joe Morgan has a worthy take on this column as well.
Topics: College Football, ESPN's Finest, Tennis | 4 Comments »
September 5th, 2007 at 1:15 AM
What about tetherball, bro? And how bout jai alai? And you can’t forget about soccer! Soccer is the greatest sport ever. Just kidding, soccer sucks my dick hard. Forget I said anything about soccer. For me, though, it’s all about scrabble. Scrabble and pocket polo. Although, these days, I’m playing more pocket polo than scrabble. I masturbate a lot.
September 5th, 2007 at 2:22 AM
11. Serena in black.
Definitely read that as Serena is black. Knowing Scoop’s MO it took me a bit before I questioned it.
September 5th, 2007 at 9:42 AM
Even after I realized it was “in” not “is,” I still read it wrong about 10 more times.
Ironic that if it was “is” it would be a better argument.
September 5th, 2007 at 3:28 PM
I respectfully have to disagree with the Serena not attractive sentiment.
Nothing is sexier than a chick who could probably mollywhop her own harasser at H2O.