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Ranking The Chris Davis Mustache Vs. Other All-Time Orioles Greats

You may have noticed that Chris Davis is on a tear, elevating his season HR total to 30. The Chris Mottram lookalike’s OPS+ is up to 134, the second-best of his career. You may have also noticed that thing on his face:

The Orioles slugger had let his beard and mustache go until it was threatening the Orioles’ strict no-beard rule, so he shaved the beard but kept the mustache.

And it looks terrible. But he can’t shave it off now.

A player on a streak has to respect the streak, you see. So, since it appears Crush’s little friend may stick around, we asked Doug Ramey (@fatpickled) to weigh in. Doug is a bit of an expert on the subject, given that he authored “The 12 Best Mustaches in Orioles History” on this very site.

Here’s what Doug had to say:

“That furry caterpillar is impressive — it almost looks like he’s wearing a disguise. It’s also comical how it looks when he has one of his over-the-top lippers in.

In order to crack the top 10 I feel it needs to last 30 days … the other guys on that list rocked the ‘stache for entire seasons. That being said, if the ‘stache has legs and lasts awhile it has top-five potential.

I do deduct points for the flavor saver he has accompanying the ‘stache. Just because his buddy Chris Tillman is still rocking a flavor saver eight years after they were out of style (if they ever were) doesn’t mean he has to add that as an accessory to his already impressive lip fur.”

D.C. sports fan and digital media guy that's been doing this since 2004. Once threw a football further than Chris Cooley.

1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. DemO'sHon

    August 15, 2015 at 5:36 AM

    Too bad it ran up against that no-hitter. At first blush, it looked awful, but the longer you looked at it, the more fantastic it seemed. I do have to say – CD’s caterpillar could take on the weak upper lip of the entire Yankees squad when they tried the same earlier in the season.

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