No, I’m Fairly Certain God Actually Hates Us and the Redskins

From loyal reader Adam Bechtold, whose brother apparently played Little League with Jamie [/cool story], comes this sign outside of Pender Methodist Church in Fairfax:


Religion isn’t really “my thing,” but is this what they mean by “the lord works in mysterious ways”? Because the church says God loves the Redskins, and he’s all knowing and powerful and all … yet the team is having its worst season since 1961. Huh. Kinda strange. If He loves both the Redskins and us, wouldn’t it stand to reason that he WOULDN’T PUT US THROUGH THIS TORTUROUS HELL WE LOST TO THE FUCKING LIONS GOD!?

I question the validity of your sign, Pender Methodist Church, and bid you a good day.


Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be over here searching for the passage in the Bible in which God commands thou shalt not run a pass play for more than three yards lest thee be overcometh with greed and the lust to penetrate the goal line thus soiling its virginity. The endzone is the devil’s playground!

2 thoughts on “No, I’m Fairly Certain God Actually Hates Us and the Redskins”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *